one last time for marriage equality

From my friend, Mark, on marriage equality and tomorrow's election: Like he said.

As tomorrow is voting day, understanding that neither candidate has the immediate fix to our financial situation and both are likely making false promises. Vote for the candidate that supports the Phrase: "Every man is created equal."

As you all know this past July, my partner and best friend of 12 years took his own life. After receiving the most disheartening letter of my entire life. I called the turnpike commission and the police to notify them of the incident that was taking place. The first call I was told "because he is a missing person, file a missing persons report".

The second call, I was told I would have to contact his "family" to have an answer.

I learned that Adam had passed from the PA Turnpike's website posted that there was an accident at the same mile marker he indicated he would be taking his life. Not knowing fully if he was dead, the police called me to ask for his parents phone number and address "IN CASE" they needed to notify someone. I was repeated asked if he was alive or dead, which I wasn't given an answer. As the minutes passed an officer came to my door and asked again for his parents address. I knew then, and I told them I would not tell them until they confirmed..

I was not family.

12 years, we owned a home together, cars, bank accounts, began an adoption process, survived the trials and tribulations that most couples do, but because of laws that promote discrimination, I was not allowed to know.

It is my wish that everyone is equal. That my partnership impacted no one else, nor impeded on anyone's right to live or practice their religion.

This is not a fake internet story. This is my story. Please vote for the candidate, vote for all candidates that promote being equal. You are no better than me, as I am not better than you.

Vote Obama at the polls this election day. 

Like he said.

on Maryland's Question 6

I'm going to say this early, since Maryland has early voting.

This summer, my friend Adam committed suicide by walking into highway traffic. Mark, his partner of 12 years, received his goodbye email, and immediately notified highway patrol. As Mark called the police over and over in hopes that they'd found Adam in time, they refused to release any information to him, even though he'd alerted them - he wasn't "family." Mark finally learned that he had succeeded in taking his own life from the Pennsylvania Turnpike Web site, which reported the accident. As plans were made for a memorial service, Adam's mother listed her son's partner in the obituary - as his brother. And thankfully, Adam had secretly transferred his savings into their joint account, because Mark was not able to inherit it.

This is what the current law allows - for long-term, same-sex partners like my friend to be denied basic courtesies during what is already the most difficult time of his life. Is that something that you really support?

If your answer is no, vote YES on Question 6. Voting YES doesn't require you to change your religious beliefs or traditional values, only that you show a little compassion for your neighbors, regardless of whether they share your beliefs. That's a value as old as time itself.

MHP + HRC = hooray!

Melissa Harris-Perry is one of the three professors on my dissertation committee. I had the privilege of working as her teaching assistant at Tulane this spring, and also worked as the volunteer coordinator on her husband's mayoral campaign. She is kind, generous, and brilliantly smart and funny. Melissa has never hidden her support for marriage equality, but it's fantastic to see her express her support this publicly.