Sunday, May 12, 2013

because deep down I am totally a child

This year, my birthday falls on a Tuesday. Awkward.

I know it's a few months away, but I already know exactly what I'm going to do.

That's right. A moon bounce. We're renting one all day, buying a keg of something I can drink and cooking out in the backyard the whole Sunday before. Because that's how real grown-ups roll.

And then on my actual birthday, dinner somewhere nice like respectable adults. Maybe Komi. Because why not?

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

lonely freak blues

Why all the posts lately about babies? Because pretty much every time I try to make advance plans with a friend, she ends up pregnant and cancels. It's starting to make me terrified that eventually I'm going to run out of friends to hang out with, and that something is wrong with me because I've always known I don't want kids. It's kind of hard to be happy for my friends when I'm lonely and feel like a freak.

Or maybe I can just take Nick's advice and get a bartending job; according to my husband, "degenerates" like him always hang out and make you feel like it's Cheers.

Monday, May 6, 2013

I want a gluten free *sandwich* directory!

Today, I had a massive craving for a burger. The problem? I'm gluten intolerant. I won't die if I eat a piece of bread, but my day is pretty much over; I get cranky, congested and itchy, and develop heartburn that doubles me over in pain. If I'm lucky, I just fall asleep and wake up feeling hungover the next morning.

When I Google "gluten free burger restaurant DC" or any equivalent search phrase, nothing worthwhile comes up. So I'm going to start a new blog label here, called simply "gluten free sandwich." Every time I encounter a restaurant that offers gluten free bread or buns as an option for their sandwiches, it will get that tag. It's unlikely Hopefully one day, there will be enough options that I can start my own app or directory or what have you, but until then, here are my only three current contributions:
Red Robin: this is a national chain, but they are delicious and offer gluten free buns for their burgers. That plus bottomless steak fries equals fat gluten free kid heaven.

Jimmy John's: again, a chain. But the JJ Unwiches are pretty much the stuff dreams are made of. Leave the cheese off, and they're even paleo. The Italian Night Club unwich made me feel bad for people who eat bread - they have to chew through all of that dough nonsense before they get to the good stuff inside.

The Wicked Waffle: a sandwich shop that puts all of its sandwiches on halves of Belgian waffles would totally creep me out, if they didn't offer gluten free waffles. The parking is atrocious, inside the place looks like a Bourbon Street daiquiri shop and the music is strictly Euro-crap, but if I can eat a gluten-free version of every single sandwich on the menu, I can put up with a whole lot.

Sunday, May 5, 2013

they're expensive, too

Sometimes, when I see my husband and his twelve year old sister playing together, I feel pretty guilty about not wanting kids. He'd be a fantastic dad: really fun and patient and hands on.
Then I remember that I teach children for a living, and at the end of the school day, want nothing more than to be away from children and around adults. Then I feel OK again. He doesn't really want to be a dad anyway. Too much work.